I follow a lady on Instagram who has six sons, yes you read that right, s-i-x. She is the best boy momma and is always pouring into their lives and finding ways to build them up. A comment I have read time and time again under her posts is, “soon you will have a girl” as if somehow that will complete their family.
When I was pregnant with my second, I remember people (in the church mind you ) would ask what I was having and when I responded with “another boy” (and a smile on my face!) their faces fell. It is after all believed that the perfect American family is made up of a boy, and a girl and then surely you are done having children.
I share the above with you because I am of the firm opinion that our society is unbalanced when it comes to the two God given genders. I am about as anti-feminist as one can get and still be a woman. Yes, I think everyone should be treated fairly, yes some unspeakable things have happened at the hands of men, yes men are fallen imperfect people, but lest we forget… so are women. We are painting with a broad brush if we think one gender is for a second any better or more important than the other and that goes both ways.
Looking back through history, there was a time where men were the preferred and women were not deemed as important or essential. Families wanted boys to pass on the family name and to have help around homesteads. The industrial revolution changed our country in a lot of ways and one of those is the way we look at men and women. Now, again please here me loud and clear when I say I am not for a second condoning abuse or sinful behavior on the part of men, if you or a loved one are in a place where you need help please reach out and talk to someone. I am however pointing out (as a wife and boy momma myself) that not all men are bad, evil people. We live in a society that would tell you otherwise, that demonizes men and the part they play in society. I am here to tell you a different story.
My husband is one of the hardest working men (tied only with my grandfather) that I have ever known. He is a vessel who God uses to provide for our family so that we may make decisions that are right for the four of us, such as having me stay home with our children. He also is a man who would give you the shirt off of his back when you needed it more than he. He loves to bless others and is constantly looking for ways to be a blessing. This post isn’t to brag about my husband – he is just as fallen as you or I. It is to share the fact that there are really good men out there. Men that work hard for their families and love them fiercely, men who should be recognized for the amazing people that they are, rather than always looked down upon.
March 4th is national sons day. I want for my sons to grow up in a world that values and appreciates them. I want them to know they are of immeasurable value to Christ. That they have a place in this world and an opportunity to make it better. I want to teach them how to treat people with love and respect and I hope that you will do the same. My boys are taught to never lay a hand on a woman and that they must talk respectfully to all they come into contact with. I think it is important we teach girls to never hit just as much as we try to drive the point home to our boys. While it is true men hold the physical advantage, woman can be just as abusive as any man. Again, to drive this point home – abuse from anyone is wrong.
It would be wonderful if we could come to a place where men and women are valued equally, where we all get along and no one is though to be better or worse than the other. Living in a broken world, I do not see this happening, though what can happen is men and women of God rising up and refusing to settle for the lies the devil tries to feed us regarding Children of God. We can show the world what it means to love and respect each other in a way that shines the light of Christ into a lost and hurting world. Perhaps then we can start making steps towards unity.
Galatians 3:28 There is neither Jew nor Gentile, neither slave nor free, nor is there male and female, for you are all one in Christ Jesus.
If you are thinking this is all coming out of left field, you are not alone. While I have never been close to believing the lies of a feminist culture, it was not until I had two sons that my eyes were open to this problem as much as they are now. Everyone knows there are more cute clothes for girls (though in recent years I do think the boy clothes game is stepping it up) and the old schoolroom rhymes of girls being made of sugar and spice and everything nice but boys being made of snips, snails and puppy dog tails”. What others may not realize is the view our culture takes of men. This is a hard post to write in that I don’t want you to think I am for one second suggesting that men are better than woman or that their haven’t been some evil men throughout history. Neither assumption is true. Again, my heart behind this post is that we would find unity and respect between genders.
With that said, if you have a son please be intentional about building them up. They are living in a world that so quickly tears them down. They need to know momma is in their corner. It is a beautiful role we have as mothers, I can only speak to being a boy momma but I do think there is a special bond between a mom and a son just as their is between a father and a daughter. If you have a daughter remind her that she is precious in the sight of the Lord!! Remind your children that God has a purpose for them and that God created them for such a time as this.
Psalm 127:3-5 Behold, children are a heritage from the Lord, the fruit of the womb a reward. Like arrows in the hand of a warrior are the children of one’s youth. Blessed is the man who fills his quiver with them! He shall not be put to shame when he speaks with his enemies in the gate.